Funny how I expect no one to read or care about this. which gives me the freedom to tell all. and feel at least a bit relieved. I am a Christian, have been one for some years now. I felt lonely and unworthy of being loved for most of my life. I tried hard getting close to God for so many years, but heaven felt airthight closed. then I met someone. He is not a Christian, and I began a secret relationship with him. it started...weird I guess. we fell in love. from the beging I started suffering, since I was betraying everything I truly, truly believe in. despite my actions, I do love God, I do believe in the bible, I do. I do. I truly do. and also, I suffered because I really love this person, how is this going to work out when we dont share the very fundamental and importance believe and faith in God? something that shapes and affects and touches every single area of my life. eventually my family found out, I was confronted. i was supposed to break up with the love of my life, ironically for both our sakes. i did. i tried. he did want to break up, u was desperate and complete broken. because of this crisis I started praying again, finally having a real relationship and fellowship with God. I thought I really do think, he spoke to me, he told me he would work a salvation miracle in him, which is why we did not break up in the end. I started praying, fasting, making vows before the altar, praying some more, for his salvation. and now it seems l. after all this time, after everything, I'm just supposed to break up, yet again. and I feel, this total and complete despair. something so deep, so huge, so much pain. I feel frozen. I don't eve. know how to react. or i dont know, it's my brain trying to protect me. i doubt know. Just please God, have mercy on is, please take care of both of us. help. just help.

My heart is breaking in a thousand pieces, I feel undone, I am the victim and the executioner. I am not sure what to think, how to feel about anything. I feel confused, broken, desperate, and hopeless. it feels that ahead nothing else lays but despair. maybe there's sunshine ahead, but there's a huge, dark, immense and endless valley of tears before. I am a monster. I deserve all this pain.

I hate Valentine's day....

Poema de Amor (II)

Podría perfectamente suprimirte de mi vida,
no contestar tus llamadas, no abrirte la puerta de la casa,
no pensarte, no desearte,
no buscarte en ningún lugar común y no volver a verte,
circular por calles por donde sé que no pasas,
eliminar de mi memoria cada instante que hemos compartido,
cada recuerdo de tu recuerdo,
olvidar tu cara hasta ser capaz de no reconocerte,
responder con evasivas cuando me pregunten por ti
y hacer como si no hubieras existido nunca.
Pero te amo.

Darío Jaramillo Agudelo

"In my eyes, you are the most precious rose in the dessert "

There must be someone who will love me, there must be.

HOW SOON IS NOW ?

I am the son
and the heir
Of a shyness that is criminally vulgar
I am the son and heir
Of nothing in particular

You shut your mouth
How can you say
I go about things the wrong way
I am Human and I need to be loved
Just like everybody else does

I am the son
And the heir
Of a shyness that is criminally vulgar
I am the son and heir
Of nothing in particular

You shut your mouth
How can you say
I go about things the wrong way
I am Human and I need to be loved
Just like everybody else does

There's a club, if you'd like to go
You could meet someone who really loves you
So you go, and you stand on your own
And you leave on your own
And you go home
And you cry
And you want to die

When you say it's gonna happen now,
When exactly do you mean?
See I've already waited too long
And all my hope is gone

The Smiths

...I'll hang on, I will. Right now things don't seem very nice, or happy, or promising, or just damn anything that could make me smile. But I'll hang on, I'll try. I have always done that, right now I suppose thats like my only quality, haven't found yet what am I really good at. Just at taking life's (not soft at all) punches, and getting up. I always get up. Right now I wonder if wouldn't it be better if I just stay there, if I just lay down, if maybe I stop trying, if ... it's raining outside...but I feel cold and wet inside... I like rainy days, I usually like them, or sunny, but right now... right now I... I feel lost, sad, alone, and well... I'll let the tears from the sky tickle me as they slip through my cracks...I'll hang on, I will.

formspring.me

La curiosidad mato al gato... :p http://formspring.me/AnnieTangerine

10 Things I Hate About You

I hate the way you talk to me
And the way you cut your hair.
I hate the way you drive my car.
I hate it when you stare.
I hate your big dumb combat boots
And the way you read my mind.
I hate you so much it makes me sick.
It even makes me rhyme.
I hate it...
I hate the way you're always right.
I hate it when you lie.
I hate it when you make me laugh;
Even worse when you make me cry.
I hate it when you're not around
And the fact that you didn't call,
But mostly I hate the way I don't hate you;
Not even close;
Not even a little bit;
Not even at all.

FUCK...I got broken again... FUCK ....

I would love to disappear... me too..

¿Es posible enamorarse sin darse cuenta? ¿esas cosas pasan? ¿es eso de alguna manera posible? O.O El dilema de mi vida...

Con el corazón patas arriba, con todo chueco, con todo torcido, con todo en desorden, con todo vuelto nada, con todo todo todo pero absolutamente todo hecho un completo desastre...¿qué hare?

Muahahaha Estudiante de psicologiaa! :p

Gracias a ti sé lo que es estar muriendo de dolor

ALL I NEED

I'm the next act
Waiting in the wings

I'm an animal
Trapped in your hot car

I am all the days
That you choose to ignore

You are all I need
You are all I need
I'm in the middle of your picture
Lying in the reeds

I'm a moth
Who just wants to share your light

I'm just an insect
Trying to get out of the night

I only stick with you
Because there are no others

You are all I need
You're all I need
I'm in the middle your picture
Lying in the reeds

It's all wrong
It's all right
It's all wrong

Just don't leave....don't leave......DON'T LEAVE

Piedras, Rosella Di Paolo

I

arrojabas las piedras contra mi cuerpo
y yo me mantuve en mi sitio,
feroz,
ninguna dio lejos del blanco.
cómo dejarlas caer sin haberme tocado.
eran tus piedras.
era sólo mi cuerpo.


II

pudiste lanzarme abismos, selvas oscuras, barcos en llamas,
pero sólo tenías piedras
y yo necesitaba algo de ti, cualquier cosa
que se desprendiera por fin de ti
y me buscara.


III

una piedra lleva tus huellas digitales,
mirando más al fondo: la palma de tu mano, su humedad.
si fuerzo aún las cosas, la precisa
atención de tus ojos, el pulso
que avienta tu vida
hacia la mía.


IV

es mejor que me incline a recogerlas.
no llegaré con las manos vacías
a la casa del amor.


V

hay gozo en la casa del amor
así cuentan
y música.
golpearé una piedra contra otra
una contra otra
disciplinadamente.

De Tablillas de San Lázaro (Lima: PUCP, 2001).

If I had a Heart, I would love you. If I had a voice, I would sing. ♥

LUGAR COMÚN

Vuelves a mí
porque el asesino
siempre vuelve
al lugar del crimen

Oscar Hahn

♫.♪.♫.♪And true love lives♫.♪.♫.♪On lollipops and crisps♫.♪.♫.♪

"Cuando vuelva de la guerra te tomaré en mis brazos y te haré el amor.
Si cuando vuelva de la guerra todavía tengo brazos.
Si cuando vuelva de la guerra todavía tengo amor."

"En esta vida hay demasiadas cosas mediocres, el amor no debería ser una de ellas"

Ya complete 5 semanas en el infierno...voy para la sexta....odio mi vida...y de paso a mi...la persona mas desastrosa del mundo...debi haberme hecho caso...debi no haber sido tan estupida...

Soy un desastre....soy un desastre total....quisiera morirme...pero ya...por favor...

Minutos- Ricardo Arjona

El reloj de pared
anunciando las 6:23.
El pasado con sed,
Y el presente es un atleta sin pies.
Ya son las 6:43
Y el cadáver del minuto que paso,
Me dice así se vive aquí te guste o no.
Y la nostalgia pone casa en mi cabeza,
Y dan las 6 con 50.
Quien te dijo que yo
Era el sueño que soñaste una vez,
Quien te dijo que tú
Voltearías mi futuro al revés,
Ya son las 7:16,
Y el cadáver del minuto que pasó,
Me dice tu estrategia te arruinó,
No queda más que ir aprendiendo a vivir solo,
Si te quedan agallas.
La casa no es otra cosa,
Que un cementerio de historias,
Enterradas en fosas,
Que algunos llaman memorias.

Minutos, Como sal en la herida,
Se me pasa la vida,
Gastando el reloj,
Minutos, Son la morgue del tiempo,
Cadáveres de momentos,
Que no vuelven jamás,
No hay reloj que de vuelta hacia atrás.

Como duele gastar,
El instante en el que tu ya no estás,
Como cuesta luchar
Con las cosas que no vuelven más,
Ya son las 9:23
Y el cadáver del minuto que paso,
Se burla de mis ganas de besar
la foto que dejaste puesta en el buró,
Mi soledad es tu venganza,
El ministerio del tiempo,
Puso sede en mi almohada,
Ahí te encuentro a momentos
Aunque no sirve de nada.

Minutos, Como sal en la herida,
Se me pasa la vida,
Gastando el reloj,
Minutos, Son la morgue del tiempo,
Cadáveres de momentos,
Que no vuelven jamás,
No hay reloj que de vuelta hacia atrás.

Minutos que se burlan de mi
Minutos como furia de mar
Minutos pasajeros de un tren que no va a ningún lugar
Minutos como lluvia de sal
Minutos como fuego en la piel
Minutos forasteros que vienen y se van sin decir
Minutos que me duelen sin ti
minutos que no pagan pensión
Minutos que al morir formaran el batallón de ayer
minutos que se roban la luz
Minutos que me oxidan la fe
Minutos inquilinos del tiempo mientras puedan durar
Minutos que disfrutan morir
Minutos que no tienen lugar
Minutos que se estrellan en mi....son Kamikazes de Dios.

El Problema- Ricardo Arjona

El problema no fue hallarte
El problema es olvidarte
El problema no es tu ausencia
El problema es que te espero
El problema no es problema
El problema es que me duele
El problema no es que mientas
El problema es que te creo

El problema no es que juegues
El problema es que es conmigo
Si me gustaste por ser libre
¿Quién soy yo para cambiarte?
Si me quede queriendo solo
¿Cómo hacer para obligarte?
El problema no es quererte
Es que tu no sientas lo mismo
Y ¿cómo deshacerme de ti si no te tengo?
¿Cómo alejarme de ti si estas tan lejos?
Como encontrarle una pestaña
A lo que nunca tuvo ojos
Como encontrarle plataformas
A lo que siempre fue un barranco
Como encontrar en la alacena
Los besos que no me diste
Y ¿cómo deshacerme de ti si no te tengo?
¿Cómo alejarme de ti si estas tan lejos?
Y el que es problema no es cambiarte
El problema es que no quiero

El problema no es que duela
El problema es que me gusta
El problema no es el daño
El problema son las huellas
El problema no es lo que haces
El problema es que lo olvido
El problema no es que digas
El problema es lo que callas
Y ¿cómo deshacerme de ti si no te tengo?
¿Cómo alejarme de ti si estas tan lejos?
Como encontrarle una pestaña
A lo que nunca tuvo ojos
Como encontrarle plataformas
A lo que siempre fue un barranco
Como encontrar en la alacena
Los besos que no me diste

Y ¿cómo deshacerme de ti si no te tengo?
¿Cómo alejarme de ti si estas tan lejos?
Como encontrarle una pestaña
A lo que nunca tuvo ojos
Como encontrarle plataformas
A lo que siempre fue un barranco
Como encontrar en la alacena
Los besos que no me diste

Y ¿cómo deshacerme de ti si no te tengo?
¿Cómo alejarme de ti si estas tan lejos?
El problema no fue hallarte
El problema es olvidarte
El problema no es que mientas
El problema es que te creo
El problema no es cambiarte
El problema es que no quiero
El problema no es quererte
Es que tu no sientas lo mismo
El problema no es que juegues
El problema es que es conmigo

Ya que no puedo acercarme a ti, ya que no puedo decirte que te amo, ni literal ni de tantas miles de formas que encontre para hacerlo...como...¿como decirte que te amo sin decirtelo? ¿como hacerte llegar todo mi amor, y que lo sientas...pero...que no te des cuenta?

ALONE

Mouthful Of Wasps - Kashmir

A list of things that should be said
Now weighs a forest on your tongue
And all your virtues safely kept
In vaseline have slipped by gone

Put it on the vast choir sings
Let the Broncos run wild again
Wipe it off that purgatory grin
Cause it's all too convincing

Show me that it's easy
Say that you are in need of me
Don't talk of the costs
With a mouthful of wasps
Time is up, so let them all fly
Up in the sky.

Yes, I was taught among your kind
By drilling tunnels towards the core
In through the multi-detailed mind
where rich and simple is at war

Put it on the vast choir sings
Let the Broncos run wild again
wipe it off that diabolic grin
Cause it's so contrived
And it frightens me

Show me that you're easy
Say that you believe in me
Don't act out your frost
with a mouthful of wasps
Time is up so them all fly

Behind those weary eyes
some broken story hides
I need to know and you have to show
Before it strikes its roots
And strangles everything

Butterflies...do they ever come back??

Si puedes tu con Dios hablar, preguntale si yo alguna vez te he dejado de adorar...

Dejame ver en tus ojos...si tienes los sueños vueltos mierda como los mios....

Nunca nunca más. Nunca más me lastimaran, nunca más nadie podrá pisotear mi corazón, nunca más nadie podrá romperme así, nunca más nadie me humillara, ni me menospreciara ni me maltratara, nunca nadie más me hará sentir como me siento en este momento. Cuando logre salir de este infierno, nadie jamás nunca me volverá a enviar a estos avernos...

"...se acaricia el pelo y dice que la vaina esta jodida y yo pienso que en verdad todo esta jodido(...)Mierda. Yo tambien estoy como jodido. Me dan ganas de ahogarme en salsa de tomate"

No, he didn't set me free, he just threw me up in the air, I couldn't understand what was going on, so to make a long story short, I crashed, I got destroyed in a million tiny pieces of me...see?? It's not trash...it's me all over the fucking floor...

SHELTER

I find shelter, in this way
Under cover, hide away
Can you hear, when I say?
I have never felt this way

Maybe I had said, something that was wrong
Can I make it better, with the lights turned on?

Could I be, was I there?
It felt so crystal in the air
I still want to drown, whenever you leave
Please teach me gently, how to breathe

And I'll cross oceans, like never before
So you can feel the way I feel it too
And I'll mirror images back at you
So you can see the way I feel it too

Maybe I had said, something that was wrong
Can I make it better, with the lights turned on?

The XX

"Don't you forget about me. Don't, don't, don't, don't"

Crumbs From Your Table

From the brightest star
Comes the blackest hole
You had so much to offer
Why did you offer your soul?
I was there for you baby
When you needed my help
Would you deny for others
What you demand for yourself?

Cool down mama, cool off
Cool down mama, cool off

You speak of signs and wonders
I need something other
I would believe if I was able
But I'm waiting on the crumbs from your table

You were pretty as a picture
It was all there to see
Then your face caught up with your psychology
With a mouth full of teeth
You ate all your friends
And you broke every heart thinking every heart mends

You speak of signs and wonders
But I need something other
I would believe if I was able
But I'm waiting on the crumbs from your table

Where you live should not decide
Whether you live or whether you die
Three to a bed
Sister Ann, she said
Dignity passes by

And you speak of signs and wonders
But I need something other
I would believe if I was able
I'm waiting on the crumbs from your table

"I still remember thinking how lovely it could be to hold you for eternity, or at least untill you fell asleep, fell asleep"

You made it rain...rain of blood

Quiero decirte tantas cosas......y ya no me sirve solo escribirlas aca, porque quiero que lo sepas, quiero q me escuches, quiero q lo entiendas.......pero ya que eso no puede ser, le dire a esta estupida pantalla que te amo, te amo muchisimo,que me haces mucha falta, te extraño todo el dia, me gustaria poder abrazarte, me gustaria compartir contigo muchas cosas, y que todo el tiempo extraño esas cosas sencillas que solo eran para ti y para mi....me gustaria poder darte mi amor, me gustaria poder demostrarte cuanto te amo todos los dias....y no puedo....me quede aqui en un mar, en un oceano de tristeza, con todo roto por dentro, y un monton de amor, muchisimo amor, y no se que hacer con ese amor...porque no quiero darselo a nadie mas, no es para nadie mas sino para ti....es solo para ti.........

Can You Read My Mind??

On the corner of main street
Just tryin' to keep it in line
You say you wanna move on and
You say I'm falling behind

Can you read my mind?
Can you read my mind?

I never really gave up on
Breakin' out of this two-star town
I got the green light
I got a little fight
I'm gonna turn this thing around

Can you read my mind?
Can you read my mind?

The good old days, the honest man;
The restless heart, the Promised Land
A subtle kiss that no one sees;
A broken wrist and a big trapeze

Oh well I don't mind, if you don't mind
'Cause I don't shine if you don't shine
Before you go, can you read my mind?

It’s funny how you just break down
Waitin' on some sign
I pull up to the front of your driveway
With magic soakin' my spine

Can you read my mind?
Can you read my mind?

The teenage queen, the loaded gun;
The drop dead dream, the Chosen One
A southern drawl, a world unseen;
A city wall and a trampoline

Oh well I don't mind, if you don't mind
'Cause I don't shine if you don't shine
Before you jump
Tell me what you find when you read my mind

Slippin’ in my faith until I fall
You never returned that call
Woman, open the door, don't let it sting
I wanna breathe that fire again

She said I don't mind, if you don't mind
'Cause I don't shine if you don't shine

Put your back on me
Put your back on me
Put your back on me

The stars are blazing like rebel diamonds cut out of the sun
When you read my mind

I really really would like to be a hummingbird, a pretty one ^^ Then I could be the flower's cupid! Or Flower's Goddess of Love anyway!!

Dios mio.....has algo conmigo por favor....ayudame a dejar de ser tan estupida......por favor...........sacame de aqui..............ya no quiero mas...ya no puedo mas....ya no doy mas.....ya no aguanto mas....no puedo mas, auxilio!

"Deberías hacerme una escarapela que me certifique con derecho a darte besos y cosas así"

No hay amor que sea eterno si no hay perdon

Entre mas lo pienso mas me da rabia y mas me duele, mas se me hace el colmo y mas me siento indignada....no puedo creerlo!! No puedo! No lo logro! No puedo creer que alguien sea tan miserable y desgraciado, de verdad q no puedo....que desgraciado!!!DESGRACIADO!!

It's crazy to love someone who's hurt you, and it's crazier to think that someone who hurt you loves you
I wish I was a little girl again, because bruised knees heal faster than broken hearts

Si es "meant to be", pues en algun futuro asi hermoso y maravilloso me pasara algo muy lindo con el...eso...eso me gustaria mucho ^^

Cherry Lips

She gave you everything she had
But she was young and dumb
She'd just turned twenty-one
So when the shit came down
Why she was nowhere to be found
This life can turn a good girl bad
She was the sweetest thing
That you had ever seen

Strong

In her bare feet, white cotton dress
A ribbon holding back her curls
In a sweet gentle voice, she sings a lullaby
To two sleepy little girls
In the nightlight glow as her babies drift off
She looks so fragile, looks so so soft

She's strong
Solid as a rock
Like a lighthouse standing alone
She's strong got the world on her shoulders
She keeps carring on
She can take the heat, she can take the cold winter
She's got faith there's no quit in her
She's strong
Yeah so strong

There's a crayon picture says 'We love you mom'
She keeps it in a frame on her desk
There's a friend of a friend
Who calls now and then
But she's not ready just yet
She might get lonely in the still of the night
But she'll hold out till she knows it's right

And sometimes when nobody else is around
She gets down
And sometimes in a moment of weakness
A single tear falls, and that's all

She's strong
She's strong
She can take the heat she can take the cold winter
She's got faith there's no quit in her
She's strong
Yeah so strong
She's strong
Yeah so strong

Something About Us-Daft Punk

It might not be the right time
I might not be the right one
But there's something about us I want to say
Cause there's something between us anyway

I might not be the right one
It might not be the right time
But there's something about us I've got to do
Some kind of secret I will share with you

I need you more than anything in my life
I want you more than anything in my life
I'll miss you more than anyone in my life
I love you more than anyone in my life

Dios mio ayudameeee!!! Siento que solo voy para atras...que nada mejora.....que me voy a quedar aqui estancada, que no lo voy a lograr Dios mio.....como voy a hacer conmigo? como voy a hacer con este sujeto que no logro sacar de lomas profundo de mi corazon?? T_T Auxilio...por favor...alguien.....auxilio...por favor....

Just Say Yes- Snow Patrol

I'm running out of ways to make you see
I want you to stay here beside me
I won't be ok and I won't pretend I am
So just tell me today and take my hand
Please take my hand
Please take my hand

Just say yes, just say there's nothing holding you back
It's not a test, nor a trick of the mind
Only love

It's so simple and you know it is
You know it is, yeah
We can't be to and fro like this
All our lives
You're the only way to me
The path is clear
What do I have to say to you
For Gods sake, dear
For Gods sake, dear
For Gods sake, dear
For Gods sake, dear
For Gods sake, dear

Just say yes, just say there's nothing holding you back
It's not a test, nor a trick of the mind
Only love

Just say yes, coz Im aching and I know you are too
For the touch of your warm skin
As I breathe you in
http://www.elyricsworld.com/just_say_yes_lyrics_snow_patrol.html

I can feel your heart beat through my shirt
This was all I wanted, all I want
Its all I want
Its all I want
Its all I want
Its all I want

Just say yes, just say there's nothing holding you back
It's not a test, nor a trick of the mind
Only love

Just say yes, coz Im aching and I know you are too
For the touch of your warm skin
As I breathe you in

No se que hacer conmigo...no se que pensar de muchas cosas....no se que hacer respecto a muchas cosas...no se que corregir, poruqe sinceramente no se q es lo q esta tan mal en casi todo....solo me siento aqui, en medio de un maldito huracan que no para...y que al parecer realmente no importa como termine, una cosa es definitiva: me va a ahcer mucho daño....nop se que hacer conmigo, no se que hacer con mi vida, no se q hacer con mi estupido corazon....una cosa es segura: Esto no va a vovler a pasar!! Siemplemente lo tirare y me deshare de el, lo enterrare y no lo volvere a escuchar, jamas de los jamases!

No puedo! No puedo! No puedo hacer esto... mo puedo...es que no puedo....todo me importa un bledo, nada se lleva el vacio dentro de mi, todo me duele, todo es tristeza, todo es vacio....todo me recuerda lo que perdi, lo mejor de mi...a Ti...solo Dios puede ayudarme porque sinceramente no veo como nada me pueda volver a hacer tan feliz, no quiero nada ni a nadie, no veo como esto va a terminar bn, no lo veo.....auxilio...alguien que me enseñe a olvidar...

Se me fue...se me fue se me fue.......y de paso se me fue todo..........se me fueron las ganas de seguir respirando, se me fueron las ganas de hacer todo, se me fue el hambre, y se me fue la valentia mañanera para poder pararme de la cama...ahora prefiero levantarme lo mas tarde posible, todo sea por no tener que verme al espejo, decirme las cosas como son y apesar de todo seguir adelante, cosa que igual no creo q este haciendo muy bien, no hago mas sino esquivar la realidad como pueda, y eso tambien me asusta, que va a pasar cuando la realidad me encuentre por la espalda y me trague? como voy a hacer para ignorarla, para negarmela si estoy en toda la panza de la tormenta?
No puedo, no puedo, y yo se que no ayuda de a mucho decir "no puedo", pero decir "si! claro que si puedo!" seria una mentira, eso no me lo creo ni yo, que soy la mata de la ingenuidad y la estupidez, o mas bn era, por lo menos ingenua, ya no soy ingenua, pero la estupidez si como que se quedara conmigo, por lo tanto supongo que seguire estrellandome contra las ventanas cerradas como las asquerosas moscas.......
Es que todavia no me la creo, ni que se fuera, ni mi ingenuidad y credulidad tan infinita, de verdad que que imbecil, que idiota, no encuentro suficientes calificativos para mi imbecilidad de persona............
Bravo, te felicito Ana, nos has metido en una buena, buenisima, como vamos a hacer ahora? como hago para salir de aqui? Bien bruta que siempre ha sido ud., y me deje llevar por sus pendejadas, ahora henos aqui, yo nos mate una vez, pero no fue tan grave como esto, o supongo que ya no nos acordamos de que se sentia ese dolor, de todas maneras con este tenemos de sobra, tenemos para rato, para dar y convidar, para sentirnos muertas, o mas bien, para hacer la vida tan malditamente agonizante que roguemos por un pepazo entre los ojos. Y ahora? Tiene alguna otra idea brillante? O todas incluyen aferrarse a las ilusiones en este desierto de perdicion? Porque creame, nada de lo que haga va a cambiar las cosas, nada devuelve el tiempo, nada sana las heridas, y mucho menos borra cicatricez, la felicito, ahora la coleccion es todavia mas grande, y eso que desde antes ya no nos cabia...pero bueno, quien me manda hacerle caso a ud. Imbecil.

Really really sad...T_T

Tear Tear Tear Sob! Snif...Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear Tear ... When will I be able to stop?...Tear...

Me siento sola, muy sola, muy sola, quisiera tener a quien poder abrazar....por lo menos..solo eso...

Odio no poder sacar toda esta maldita tristesa de mi....si hubiera por lo menos una maldita manera.......no se q hacer....no se cantar, no se escribir, no se pintar...no se hcaer nada bn.....no se jugar futbol bn....yo solo soy un fastidio...uno insignificante afortunadamente....supongo....insignificante...

Why am I so damn insignificant!?????????????????????????????????'

I wish I could make you as happy as that silly thing...

La esperanza es lo ultimo que se pierde, y generalmente esa frase se supone que sea alentadora, pero sinceramente, en este momento, me encantria poder matar y asesinar mi esperanza para siempre, abrir bien los ojos, apuntar y terminar con lo que queda de mi corazon, loego cerrar el hueco en mi pecho, tomar una pala y esconder los restos de mi esperanza y corazon, y finalmente irme por la vida, libre, feliz, realista....

Loving you hurts, hurts more than anything in my whole life had ever hurt me

Lonely lonely that is me....

La Luna

A María Kodama

Hay tanta soledad en ese oro.
La luna de las noches no es la luna
que vio el primer Adán. Los largos siglos
de la vigilia humana la han colmado
de antiguo llanto. Mírala. Es tu espejo.

Jorge Luis Borges

1.964

I
Ya no es mágico el mundo. Te han dejado.
Ya no compartirás la clara luna
ni los lentos jardines: Ya no hay una
luna que no sea espejo del pasado,

cristal de soledad, sol de agonías.
Adiós las mutuas manos y las sienes
que acercaba el amor. Hoy sólo tienes
la fiel memoria y los desiertos días.

Nadie pierde ( repites vanamente )
sino lo que no tiene y no ha tenido
nunca, pero no basta ser valiente

para aprender el arte del olvido.
Un símbolo, una rosa, te desgarra
y te puede matar una guitarra.

II
Ya no seré feliz. Tal vez no importa.
Hay tantas otras cosas en el mundo;
un instante cualquiera es más profundo
y diverso que el mar. La vida es corta

y aunque las horas son tan largas, una
oscura maravilla nos acecha,
la muerte, ese otro mar, esa otra flecha
que nos libra del sol y de la luna

y del amor. La dicha que me diste
y me quitaste debe ser borrada;
lo que era todo tiene que ser nada.

Sólo me queda el goce de estar triste,
esa vana costumbre que me inclina
al Sur, a cierta puerta, a cierta esquina

Jorge Luis Borges

So I just Give Up, and decided to just comunicate him in all the possible forms that I'm totally and irreversibly crazy about him

Que Todo Se Vaya A La Mierda....A La Maldita Mierda...

Happy Fucking month...who damn cares?? at least not you, you don't give a damn for anything.........and I, I am the most stupid being I have ever seen, beacuse after all, all I wish I could make you feel is how much I love you.....stupid me stuid me stupid me.....

OUT OF REACH

If you go away...can I have one last kiss?? so that I can remember forever the taste of your lips...

What can I do to make you crazy about me? Just as crazy as I am for you...
What can I do to make you love me?? Just as much as I love you...
That is everything I'm asking for...You, just you...

Maybe we are just a mistake....

If you go away, tell me first how to stop the pain, please tell me how to live without you...if you go away, please...

Someone please, please, just shoot me, suffocate me, I don't know...just finish me...you'll do the world a favor...specialy to those arounde me...and off course, to me...

"...And I wished you cried for me, for I cried so many times, endlessly, and no one heard me."

Stay with me, forever... please!!

Maybe I should just let you go... the problem is that I don't want to, I am not ready to lose you, and being realistic I don't think I will ever be...I love you so much, so, so if you go, what then? what do I do to stop the pain? what do I do to keep going on? what can I do to stop loving you? what am I supose to do with me then? I just don't know, I just don't know how to heal a broken heart, how to start all over again without you...and...I just can't picture anymore my life without you...

I wish I could tell you how much I love you, I wish you could really understand and know how much I love you, I wish I could kiss you right now, I wish I could sleep in your arms, I wish ... I wish you loved me as much as I love you ... I love you...................and I really wish I could be everything you want, but I just seem to be the opposite...If only you could see how my heart aches for you, how much I need you, how incredibly gorgeous you are to me in everything...I'll give everything to you, for you..what else can I do? I'm so in love with you...tell me, tell me what do, so that you can love as much as I do... tell me what can I do to deserve your heart.......please don't go..........

the only thing that I find worthy for me to do, is to die...I wish I was dead...I really wish I was dead....

I just can't let go of you...

somebody...please love me...please....

why don't you love me???

why am I such and idiot?

I wish I was important to you...

I wish I didn't exist....

someone please tell me how to fix a broken soul...what to do with my broken heart....

what to do with stupid me...

stupid me....

stupid me....

how could you ever belive that actually somebdy would be with you?

why anybody would do that?

It's not like you are special or something...you are just another really stupid girl...

you don't worth it, not the love, respect, attention, or anything else...

you are just an obstacle in the way...

you are so damn anoying, horrible, stupid, ugly, why would anybody love you???

why woud anybody do that???

please...somebody..please..love me...stay by my side...even if I am so...so totally undesirable....

If I were a Boy...

If I were a boy
I think I could understand
How it feels to love a girl
I swear I'd be a better man

I'd listen to her
'Cause I know how it hurts
When you lose the one you wanted
'Cause he's taking you for granted
And everything you had got destroyed

I'd put myself first
And make the rules as I go
'Cause I know that she'd be faithful
Waiting for me to come home, to come home

But you're just a boy
You don't understand
And you don't understand, oh
How it feels to love a girl
Someday you wish you were a better man

You don't listen to her
You don't care how it hurts
Until you lose the one you wanted
'Cause you're taking her for granted
And everything you had got destroyed
But you're just a boy

para ti solo soy un estorbo en el camino....de mi solo esperas errores, fallas......la mayoria de las cosas q recerdas de mi son mis deficiencia y como lograron afectar todas tus cosas importantes....que quieres de mi?? todo aquello que, aunque me gustaria mucho poder dar, no puedo...soy incapaz...no se como ni porque....pero por mas q me esfuerze nunca logro llenar esa alta expectatva q tu tienes de mi..tan solo agrego otro evento a tu lista de errores mios, tan solo hago algo mas para que me recuerdes que para ti solo soy un estorbo, que siempre hago y digo todo mal, nunca tengo la razon, y daño o estropeo tus planes, ilusiones etc....yo solo soy un estorbo....

How to heal broken heart??? please....someone tell me....tell me what to do....what can I do? to forget, to stop loving........wish I never ever meet you........

I wish...I wish I wasn't a burden for everything and everybody...I really wish...............

Somos cuerpoespines......T_T

...Should I wait for you...My substitute for love

Jude I Know

You've got such a pretty smile.
It's a shame the things you hide behind it.
Let um go give it up for a while...
Let um free and we will both go find it.

I know there's no where you can hide it.
I know the feeling of alone.
I know that you do not feel invited,
But come back, come back in from the cold.

Step away from the edge.
Your best friend in life is not your mirror.
Back away come back away come back away...
I am here and I will be forever and ever and i...

I know that there's no where you can hide it.
I know the feeling of alone.
Trust me and don't keep that on the inside.
Soon you...you'll be locked out on your own.

You're not alone...

You're not alone...

And don't say you've never been told.
I'll be with you till we grow old...
Till am old grown and i'm cold..

I'm not further beyond the grown..
I'll be with you till we grow up young..
Like a dog you can always come home..
Pick up a bone..
Look around town baby down town
Don't throw me to the pound..
Look around look around...

I REALLY WISH I WAS DEAD....REALLY....

I'll Put A Spell On You

I've been watching your world from afar
I've been trying to be where you are
And I've been secretly falling apart
Unseen
To me, you're strange and you're beautiful
You'd be so perfect with me
But you just can't see
You turn every head but you don't see me

I'll put a spell on you
You'll fall asleep
When I put a spell on you
And when I wake you I'll be the first thing you see
And you'll realize that you love me

Yeah
Ye-ah

Sometimes the last thing you want comes in first
Sometimes the first thing you want never comes
But I know that waiting is all you can do
Sometimes

I'll put a spell on you
You'll fall asleep
When I put a spell on you
And when I wake you I'll be the first thing you see
And you'll realise that you love me

I'll put a spell on you
You'll fall asleep
Cause I put a spell on you
And when I wake you I'll be the first thing you see
And you'll realize that you love me, yeah

Yeah
Ye-ah
Yeah
Ye-ah

Soul Collage

Realmente, no sabes como duele,
no sabes la agonia.....
no te imaginas que tanto me martiriza
saber que nos perdemos poco a poco...
duele tanto que preferiria no haberte conocido nunca,
que deseo con fervor no amarte mas,
ojala, ojala existiera la maquinita ese de Eternal Sunshine...
entonces no seria tan dificil...

AMARTE DUELE

Te quiero de aqui a marte,
amarte duele tanto que no se que hacer
si verte en el aparador, tocarte y quererte
amarte duele yeh yeh.

Te quiero de aqui a marte,
aunque la gente siga nuestros pasos yo
te pido que mires reloj
y quedate aunque due-ele.

Y amarte duele,
quiero llevarte a marte y quererte,
si el mundo no conspira no se puede,
el amor llevarte a marte y quererte- yeh.

Escapare contigo a marte
ali no importa nada, te podr querer
pero tu hermana dice que no sientes lo que dices y me duele-yeh.

Y amarte duele,
quiero llevarte a marte y quererte,
si el mundo no conspira
no se puede, el amor
quiero llevarte a marte y quererte yeh. (x2)

Y amarte duele,
quiero llevarte a marte y quererte,
si el mundo no conspira
no se puede, el amor
quiero llevarte a marte y me duele-e.

Y amarte duele yeh
Y amarte duele-le-le
Y amarte,amarte duele
Y amarte duele
Y amarte duele..

LOVE DOESN'T EXISTS

But everything you wanted from me
Is everything that I could never be

When somebody falls in love with you, you take responsability of her/his heart want it or not...

Knock Knock, Someone in there??

I wish mine could at least do something with solar light, then waking up all mornings wouldn't be such a waste of time, with this useless brain of mine...

Come mierdaa! Come Mierda!! COME MIERDAAA!!!Come mierdaa! Come Mierda!! COME MIERDAAA!!!Come mierdaa! Come Mierda!! COME MIERDAAA!!!Come mierdaa! Come Mierda!! COME MIERDAAA!!!Come mierdaa! Come Mierda!! COME MIERDAAA!!!Come mierdaa! Come Mierda!! COME MIERDAAA!!!Come mierdaa! Come Mierda!! COME MIERDAAA!!!Come mierdaa! Come Mierda!! COME MIERDAAA!!!Come mierdaa! Come Mierda!! COME MIERDAAA!!!Come mierdaa! Come Mierda!! COME MIERDAAA!!!Come mierdaa! Come Mierda!! COME MIERDAAA!!!Come mierdaa! Come Mierda!! COME MIERDAAA!!!Come mierdaa! Come Mierda!! COME MIERDAAA!!!Come mierdaa! Come Mierda!! COME MIERDAAA!!!Come mierdaa! Come Mierda!! COME MIERDAAA!!!ome mierdaa! Come Mierda!! COME MIERDAAA!!!Come mierdaa! Come Mierda!! COME MIERDAAA!!!Come mierdaa! Come Mierda!! COME MIERDAAA!!!Come mierdaa! Come Mierda!! COME MIERDAAA!!!

If Not...well..then I suppose that lots of things will suck, most of them to be honest, If Not, then I won't be able to throw away so much things impregnated of you...so I'll just store them in some box away from my broken heart, If Not, I'll throw to the abyss so many dreams and illusions...If Not, I'll cry, until my head and heart understand, I don't think that's possible...If Not, I'll go far far far away, where memories don't hunt me, at least not as they would if I stay...If Not...If Not, then I will have to answer all those questions that right now don't seem to need and immediate answer, like : Will I be able to love again? to love as I used to love you? Will I be able to carry on? Will I be able to smile again? to not to drown in my own tears and sadness? Will I be able to forget you? Will I be able to look to someone else without comparing him to you(does even this hypothetical future Him exists???)? Will I be able to live and love without having your gosht hunting me? From the bottom of my heart, everything cries, please stay...I know it's not your decision, but I can't help begging you...to please stay...

He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not...

Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No

Stars!

Stay can't you see that I
I wanna fall from the stars
Straight into Your arms

Morning Sonata

by IMustBeDead

Frozen Heart

We need to talk.

Things are just not the same with us anymore.

You don't act like you used to.

I wish it could just be like it was.

I think we should just be honest about the situation, because I don't want to be waisting my time, or yours.

God the way you used to look at me, it made me melt everytime.

What happened to us?

What happened to you?

This isn't how I wanted things to turn out.

I wanted us to be different.

Is our love fake?

Is it real? or is just an illusion? It's so pretty at the begginig...so incredible...you can almost touch and taste the paradise, you feel in heaven...you can't believe it's happening, neither that it's real, and that he actually exists...the you find yourself crying...because you saw that couple, and now what you can't belive, it's that it is gone...you lost it...now is just a memory, of how you would like your life to be for ever...even though now is for shure...it's just an illusion...is real for a limited time...and you already spend it all...there isn't left anymore...it's time to go on...it's impossible not to look back, feel a tear go down your cheek, close your eyes for a while...try to remember how it felt, how it was, the happiness you felt...and then wishing that never happened, so going on wouldn't be so dificult, walk away, into a cold path, wishing in a, still warm, corner of your heart, to find something so incredible in what lies ahead of you.

Nombre Ana Catalina Díaz Riveros
Fecha de Nacimiento 14/10/1987
Sexo Femenino
Descripción Orgullosa, caprichosa, terca, despistada y estupida
Nota Las apariencias engañan

"I should get used to being with me...just with me, but the problem is that I am so stupid, I just can't, and I know that I have to, but for some reason, even when I know that everything with me is wrong, everyhting I ever say, think or do, is just wrong, I can't start getting things well, like beign for the human being sake's alone, just with me"

"You say you don't agree with this or that, you say nobody should do this, or act like that...but the thing is...you do just that, you think just like thtat, you don't consider this...and you make everyone feel the same way you feel, just when you are arguing about that..."

Ballet

..........................................................................................
.....If I could dance....I'll fly..I'll be delicate enough to seem floating....nothing would be more graceful than me just dancing around...I'll let my dreams fly as high as they can...I'll just slide delicately....and smile....

The man who could make you sure he was the one

"Why should he come back through the park?
You thought that you saw him but no you did not
Who can be sure of anything through
The distance that keeps you
From knowing the truth

Why would you think your boy could become
The man who could make you sure he was the one?

The one
My one
My one"

USELESS

no good for anything
not good at anything
lost case
just another obstacle in the way
no special gifts at all
just another common being
just another ordinary human
just one more for the over populated earth
just a simple woman....

Devastated

Torn to pieces....
why does it hurts so much???
I can't eve stop crying...
I can't even sleep...
I even though how I wanted everything to stop hurting so much...
I feel so damn lonely...
I don't know who to call, who to talk...I really need somebody...
please...someone help...
I don't even wan't to talk, or explain anything..I just need a shoulder to cry on...
I just need a hug...I just want this pain to stop...
please someone...help me...help me...

I hope we can find a way

Love, I hope we get old
I hope we can find a way
Seeing it all
Love, I hope we can be
I hope I can find a way
Of letting you see
That I'm so easy to please
So easy

Love, I hope we grow old
I hope we can find a way
Of seeing it all
Love, I hope we can be
I hope I can find a way
Of letting you see
That I'm so easy to please
So easy

And now...what do I do with myself!?!??!

the road i walk is empty
the love i found is fake
where will i go
to find the rainbow
because
the sun is going down . . .

Feliz dia del amor y la amistad...

(8)Where do you go when you're lonely??
Where do you go when you're blue???
Where do you go when you're lonely??(8)
Y ahora que hago con mi yo vacia?
q se supone que haga con esos chocolates??
que se supone q haga conmigo!??!
madita sea...
desde dpnde se supone q me tire!?!?!?
Simplemente todo es una razon mas para llorar,
ojala por lo menos pudiera ahogarme en mis estupidas lagrimas.....

Sadness, loneliness....for me it's kinda hard to express how do I exactly feel when I'm sad and lonely just with words, I need pictures, images...sadness is a grey sky,it's gonna rain...and I am all dressed up for you, but you haven't come, I am with my hands full of gifts for you, where are you?? I am with lots of stories saved for you in my mind, but definetlly you're not coming.....all my make up is ruined, I've been crying, I don't want anyone to notice, so I better let go the pony tail and cover my ugly face with my hair. The worst thing is that I'm lost, can get back home, and can't find any where to hide from the rain...anyway it's not important anymore, I am all wet, so who cares? No one, not even me...so I'll just let go of everything....

Look what you've done...

"You really know where to start
Fixing a broken heart
You really know what to do
Your emotional tools can`t cure any fool
Whose dreams have broken apart
Fixing a broken heart"

The Search

Yellow praire, runig runing, just runing as fast as I can, to where? to where my feets lead me, to where the wind blows....stop...look at the sky, play with the butterflies, listen to the birds, smile, look again to the sky, feel the sun,...how warm..turn around, spin spin spin, just spining, fell down and laught, until my tummy hurts, smile, close my eyes...look at the funny spots in my eyelids...stand up again, walk to the sunshine, then hide in the fresh shadow, go into the woods, see funny creatures..see pretty living things....feel alive...miss you a lot...........just searching for my heart, couldn't find it.....not yet....where are you?.............and then crying alone in the darkness............just so lonely....so sad....so empty....so sad.......

True Lonliness

It's Amazing How Everything Can Return to It's original state

Weather State

DeviantArt!! Aqui vooy!

http://kyouka87.deviantart.com/gallery/
Nada maravilloso, nada espectacular...es tan solo un comienzo, depronto algun dia hasta tendre mi propia pagina web de esas todas sofisticadas solo para mi...por ahora, es esto, nada espectacular, nada genial, pero algun dia, seran espectaculares, seran geniales!!!

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.....And how am I suppose to get warm???

Me siento sola solita sola....solisima...increiblemente sola....mejor dicho mas sola pa' donde...y no se...no tiene razon de ser...soy un fastidio....soy egoista...soy jarta, impositiva, melindrosa, quisquillosa, etc....yo se eso...yo se que no tengo derecho, que, es mas, aqui entre nos la cosa es bastante al reves...pero mis razonamientos simplemente no logran espantar esta asquerosa soledad...

Sañorita Pajarito

Yo me pregunto, porque un bichito qu tiene pepitas en su caparasonsito, y alitas para volar, y paticas articuladas, y no tiene huesitos, ni plumas, ni piquito, ni canta, ni nada de esas cosas se llama Señorita Pajarito, porque? no se de donde salio el mariquita y el petaquita, pero Ladybird es el mas peculiar de todos, Señorita Pajaritooo!?!? y los que no son señoritas!? y si es un señorito?? Señorita Pajarito no le va de a mucho a los Señoritos, pobres señoritos, no seria nada raro que algun dia uno llegara reclamando por sus plumas, sus huesitos y su pico, ah, y lo mas importante, sus cuerdas vocales.

La tristeza me carcome,
el dolor me desgarra el alma,
el desasosiego asfixia mi sonria,
la pesadumbre me aplasto y muero lentamente,
sucumbo bajo la impotencia de no poder salvar mi sonrisa.

Una brisa fria congelo mi alma,
era el reflejo de la soledad que me inundaba,
se desbordo por mis ojos, me mojo de tristeza y melancolia,
entonces como Ofelia ensopo mis cabellos y mi ropa,
empapo mis vestiduras negras,
el peso del dolor me arrastro hasta el fondo del abismo,
en donde ya ni los rayos del sol penetran.

No...todo se derrumba....el frio me invade....entra por debajo de la ropa, a tarvez de la ropa...entra a chorros por los agujeros de mi corazon...entonces me enfrio desde adentro, lentamente, hasta que el dolor es insoportable, hasta no sentir mis dedos...no poder hablar bien...mi lengua se ha congelado, y torpemente las pronuncio mientras enredo el orden de las letras....a donde se ha ido el sol?